If you were around during the 70’s you may remember a campaign launched by Nixon called the War on Drugs. Well, I wanna go on record to say that I believe it was a war on black people because it destroyed the entire black family dynamic by creating drug addicts, drug dealers, and babies born addicted to drugs however I’m gonna digress on that, for now.
Y’all didn’t come here for that.
But I shared that with you to let you know that I am a direct product of said war because I was one of those babies born addicted to crack cocaine. And if you know anything about when a baby is born addicted you know they immediately snatch you away from your birth mom and place you in the care of social services.
Two disadvantages happened to me upon birth. First, once they realized I was born addicted, they isolated me so they could wean me off the substances and allow me to shake and cry without disturbing the healthy babies. I didn’t get the luxury of skin to skin contact and the mother-child bonding that every baby deserves. Second thing, because my mom ingested harmful substances while pregnant with me, this affected my brain chemistry so I developed major depressive disorder as well as what we now know as ADHD.
So, I’m placed in a foster home and now not only do I NOT have a family, now I have proof that something is wrong with me and I am not enough. Or at least that was the story that played in my mind every day of my life no matter what home I was placed in.
I went through life feeling lost, forgotten, abandoned, and broken. This is why one of my top driving basic needs is the need to feel significant.
I used outward behaviors to fill the need of my inward inadequacies.
In trying to meet my need to feel significant, I quickly learned how to study human behavior and I realized there are two types of people who got a lot of attention: funny people and people who achieved success.
In trying to meet my need to feel significant, I quickly learned how to study human behavior and I realized there are two types of people who got a lot of attention: funny people and people who achieved success.
Because I was driven to feel significant, I became two things. Can you guess what they were? If you said class clown and overachiever you would be correct.
Being funny is not a bad thing. Neither is having the ambition to achieve success however because I had an unhealthy obsession with the need to feel significant, these driving needs became the source of 100% of my bad behavior.
Being a deprived, abused, abandoned, and neglected child caused me to have such a love and passion for children in the world. And most importantly, the misunderstood, lonely, and the world's most vulnerable children, the foster children.
I became a nanny for many years taking family assignments here and there and quickly became in high demand so, during the summer months, I gathered all of my families and started a specialty summer camp.
Once I started the camp, parents came from everywhere. Because I was so good with the children, parents told their friends about the camp and it filled immediately.
In my second year into summer camp, I had parents lined up by the door daily asking me for advice on how to hack unfavorable behaviors.
I wanted to develop a community where we can laugh, cry, support, and assist parents on this journey.
Throughout my 20+ years of working as a family support specialist, I’ve developed some ‘secrets’ to hacking ANY behaviors in 5 minutes or less.
Between my summer camps, my work in the foster care community, and my podcast, I've helped parents all over the world in countries I can’t even pronounce. I’ve helped hundreds of children and I know I haven’t even scratched the surface of the impact that I want to make in the world.
There are two things I'm passionate about: helping busy moms raise great kids and developing the world’s most vulnerable child, the foster child.
Now I wanna help you and your family thrive.
So grab a notebook and pen, and let’s get this party started!
3 Steps to Hacking ANY Behavior in 5 mins or less!
You're a busy mom. You ain’t got time for little Johnny, Bobby, Ricky, or Tameka to be acting out. You’re already exhausted. Am I right? So, yea, let’s not do that, shall we?
It all starts with you boo! Learning your parenting style and how to transform for the better is the first place you start. Ask yourself a few questions. What are your triggers? How does your body language affect your child’s behavior? How does your parenting style incite family dysfunction? Once you have the answers to these questions, you are unstoppable as a parent.
There is a tool that I use for every client I have: influence. The reason why children don’t listen to their parents is that there has been a breakdown in the influence department. So the only way to gain their ear is to build your influence. We will discuss both positive and malicious influence so that you can continue to empower your child to thrive. Figure out your secret recipe for influence so you can use it DAILY!
Spend 5 mins (minimum) a day meeting your family needs and you will be able to hack ANY behavior in less than 5 mins...GUARANTEED!